My Monster

[uhsir]

"I'm too young for this!" I cried out to my gynecologist six months ago.

"No, dear, you are not," she explained tenderly, "and you will continue to experience these sensations for many years, going away only after you reach menopause." 

PMDD, short for PreMenstrual Dysphoric Disorder.

She then reminded me that I had mentioned this problem at my previous year's exam but I did not consider it troublesome enough to require treatment.  Did I still feel that way?  I told her that the time from ovulation until bleeding is hell. I am unbearable to live with, words used by my husband, and I just want to lock myself in a closet until it's passed.  That's when she nodded and wrote out a prescription for an anti-depressant, told me to get back to taking my vitamin supplements, start exercising again and she monitored me for a few months to be sure I did better.  I am doing better. 

To put this into layman's terms, PMDD is "supercharged PMS" that occurs between ovulation and menstruation.  Of course, I couldn't be satisfied with just the layman's explanation so I did some investigating.

According to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fourth Edition (DSM-IV), published by the American Psychiatric Association, the symptoms are:
Quote

1. Markedly depressed mood, feelings of hopelessness, self-depreciation
2. Suddenly feeling sad or tearful, with increased sensitivity to personal rejection
3. Decreased interest in usual activities
4. Lethargy, fatigue, marked lack of energy
5. Accompanying depressive symptoms there is always the danger for suicidal ideation and behavior.
6. Marked changes in appetite and cravings for certain foods
7. Insomnia or hypersomnia
8. Marked anxiety, tension, feeling of being keyed-up or on-edge
9. Persistent or marked irritability, anger, increased interpersonal conflicts
10. Feeling overwhelmed or out of control
11. Subjective sense of having difficulty concentrating

/Quote

To be diagnosed as PMDD, at least 5 of the symptoms must be present in the two weeks prior to (late luteal phase) menstuation.  I have 1, 2, 3, 4, 7, 8, 9, 10 and 11.  They happen every cycle and only for the two-ish weeks beginning with ovulation.  Luckily, I don't have a monthly cycle.  Mine's more like 6 weeks.  So I typically get a month of relative bliss in between.  Thank God!

There are a lot of naysayers who cry that PMDD is just a ploy by the drug companies to push up sales of antidepressants.  I simply ask these people to look into history.  This has been a recognized condition as far back as Hippocrates.  But I waste my breathe on those people. And I won't waste time on them. 

In a few days I will feel wonderful and happy. I'll barely remember how traumatic all of this is.  It's as if there are two of me. 

Comments

[l-jade.livejournal.com]

I'm glad that at least you know what's your problem is, therefore you can medicate it or do something about it. I do feel crappy about 2 weeks before my period, but usually it's just 2-3 days.

[uhsir.livejournal.com]

Start keeping track of it all. I remember starting out with occasional symptoms and it's easy to just ignore it until it's out of control. If you track it you be able to start doing something when/if it gets worse. Just knowing what is wrong has helped me feel better, I guess because I'm not so worried.

[gatebee.livejournal.com]

Uhsir, I hope those meds are doing their job cause those symtoms are no joke. Take care.

[uhsir.livejournal.com]

The meds are working and the doc said if needed I can get them increased, but I'd rather not do that and actually would prefer to not take them at all. But I fear without them I may ruin my relationships and I do not want that to happen.

[jenniferjf.livejournal.com]

*sigh* I'm there with you. Have had it undiagnosed for years and was diagnosed after a complete work-up when I developed full blown Post-Partum Depression.

So I know there's a two week period in which I can't make any major decisions, and in which John does a lot of smiling and 'yes, dear'ing.

I, too, used drugs initially along with lifestyle and dietary changes. I've gone off drugs, and the other changes seem to keep it enough under control (I actually quit a very well paying job because LtS)...

But you have my empathy and I hope things work for you!!! *hugs* OTOH, I do do some of my best writing at the very beginning of those two weeks, so...

[uhsir.livejournal.com]

I will be quitting my well paying job also. When my husband retires in a year and a half, I will give my notice. I am confident that I can then go off of the drugs, well at least the anti-depressant. Hopefully the huge lifestyle change will result in a positive dietary change and I can also get off of the BP meds.

my monster

[(Anonymous)]

I can really relate to you UhSir. I have seen an increase in headaches and well as some of the symptons you mentioned. A friend of mine is using progesterone cream and says it has helped so much in stabilizing her periods and moods as well. I'm glad your doctor is helping you out as I've been told its all in my mind before.

Re: my monster

[uhsir.livejournal.com]

This is definitely not imagined. I'm lucky my ob/gyn is the wonderful lady she is. I've been seeing her for 20 years and she really cares. When she gets the results of tests, she personally makes the call to tell me the result.

I've read about progesterone cream. I'm very scared about using anything hormones, but I'm not too informed about them so I should bring that up with my doctor next time.